That's just the way it is...
The pain worked like a shard of glass pushing and worming its way through my muscle. I could feel the tissue ripping merely as I began to rise out of the chair. The blood vessels must have been bursting around the affected area as mixed signals from the trapped nerve echoed out into my brain.
I was being crippled.
I can't say I've always been a fantastic image of health. I'm not what you'd call a keen fitness fanatic. I laugh when I pass gyms where people vie for the goldfish bowl positions on the treadmill. When I was younger however my exercise was enforced through not having enough money; I would cycle everywhere.
It resulted in me having an element of geek fitness. Pasty white from lack of sun, skinny through lack of food and freakishly large leg muscles through all that cycling; I could easily bench press twice my body weight using my legs much to the horror of fitness people who figured my fragile body would just snap.
I suppose this was my problem.
I really didn't feel I had any limitations. I ate what I wanted, I did what I wanted. I humped that damn bike everywhere on my shoulder without any regard to my health. That I think is where it all started; an 18 year old walking around crippled with back pain like an 80 year old.
It comes and goes, but most annoyingly is how it comes.
You can feel the pain feeding through your body, the muscle spasm building deep inside you. Whatever you do, it becomes unavoidable; there is no way to back-off from the trigger movement. You know you'll be crippled for days by one simple action such as placing a coffee cup.
Let's face it. I'm screwed. Damn you body, why can't you respond to your brain and rise above it?
posted by Justin at 3/24/2005 09:59:00 am
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